My Life's Calling

Last night was very dramatic for me as I probed very deeply into a question that every human being asks themselves at a certain point in their lives. What am I doing here? What is my life's calling? My answer to those questions are, I still have no freaking clue! But I know what it isn't and that is NOT along the lines of being a doctor.

Now I have this friend who is quite known for having 'anger management issues'. Most people can't bear with him but I tolerate him because I feel that his heart is in the right place. So I was asleep and my roommate woke me up all of a sudden saying that this guy was looking for me and I could hear his voice outside shouting 'Den, Den, my hand got cut off'. Now, he's also known to be quite the prankster and I thought he was just pulling my leg because we just watched a zombie movie so I thought he was just trying to be funny.

My eyes were as round as plates the minute I got out into the corridor because there was blood everywhere. It was as if little bloody leprechauns were dancing all over the corridor floor and his hand was literally dangling off his wrist. He wanted to open his room door and I couldn't figure it out, so I had to hold his hand to keep it from toppling over for a few minutes and I could actually feel his bones. Not forgetting that I was getting drenched in his blood as well. I always thought of myself as someone who is able to handle blood but boy, was I wrong. I felt as if I was going to faint before my friend.

After a few cigarettes, I got my brain working again and got things together. The ambulance came and took him away immediately. I was left standing in the cold, drenched in blood as I walk back the blood filled corridor. I was so disturbed that I only fell asleep around 6 in the morning. I have no idea what the fuck happened to him and the only thing he tells us is that he slipped.

We came up with all sorts of theories and one of them was attempted suicide because that was what the guard suggested. I guess we'll just have to wait till he comes home first.

So, yeah. I remember a time once when I wanted to become a doctor because I wanted to make a change in the world and I wanted to help people. Once I got into form 4 and started learning biology, I realized that I'd be saving MORE lives by NOT becoming a doctor because I won't be killing people with my 'license to kill'. Talk about a bullet dodged for mankind.


I finally know what a refugee feels like. I shall stop making jokes about refugees all over the world and I humbly ask for your forgiveness. I should have never taken sadistic pleasure out of your misery.

Let me tell you what happened. After a long week of torture mentally ( from professors ) and physically ( from the harsh Moscow weather ), I was looking forward to a nice day indoors, where I can keep myself warm under my blanket, put on some relaxing music and enjoy a good book. This is one of the many simple life pleasure that I enjoy and it's been awhile since I've been able to do it. 5 minutes into my little piece of heaven, the director of the hostel walks in and says that we have to move everything because they want to do some renovations to the room. It took us bloody 5 hours to move everything and another 2 to settle in into our new room. We'll be here for 2 weeks at least so the room is in a mess. Most of our things are 2 floors below and the things that we've brought up with us are nowhere to be found. The rooms are nice though but it's freezing. I'm sitting down in my sweater and jeans while typing this. I literally know how it feels like to live in a fridge. But then again, that's what you get for coming to one of the coldest places on Earth. A Lebanese guy once told me that he feels like he's being punished for all his sins whenever he steps out into the cold. I feel you, bro.

On a lighter side, I found a lot of shit that I thought I've lost over the years and we've finally found the initiative to redecorate the room once we move back in. The most amazing thing I found was this piece of paper that I wrote when I was 15. I can't even remember bringing it to Moscow, I thought I lost it while cleaning my room before moving to boarding school. It must have slipped somewhere into my books when I was bringing them here. So, here's what I wrote. Just so you know, this was when I was really into the 'conspiracy theory' and shit like that.

Each old year passes with shameful deeds in hindsight,
Each new year reinforces more dreadful plans in foresight,
For September 11 to happen we made way,
We allowed unbridled power to hold sway,
Terrifying global atrocities of ignominy,
We watched, for refugees we collected money.
High altitude bombs on Afghanistan fall,
We watch, we hear, we read it all.
Death it rained to children, women and elders,
In towns, villages and on mudhouse dwellers.
Like grain to flour pounded they are,
Undefeated remain the networks of Al-Qaeda.
To wage war two marched armies attack,
There was no war, 'they' didn't fight back,
"Harborers of terrorist," bla bla bla,
Innocent peasants, it was not their war.
Hiding high above the clouds, cowards superior,
No soldier on ground dared combat the warrior.
Feuding warlords to kill their kith they came,
For the world power's strategy they fell, what shame.
World leaders have turned sheep to 'blair' around the 'bush'.
The rest of us around our necks wear a shameful flush.
"A hundred days, a hundred ways" a victory claim?
Our mortal target no where in sight to aim.
"This war on terrorism, your families will live 'in peace'"
Anger and hatred in the hearts of war victims will cease.
Last drop of family blood sinks in the sand,
Nothing more to lose except life in hand,
With every bomb a hundred more human terrors cloned,
For vengeance is sweet, suicide honed.
We, the nations of the world, stand in condemnation,
We breed the agents for our self-destruction.
War is no way for peace, but the knell,
The UN head takes the cake Nobel.
Justification of draconian legislations,
With the weapon of the 'Medes and the Persians'.
"Members of the world has never been more united", says Georgy.
United in shame, dancing with Ares and Mars in orgy,
World leaders hailed in the annals of history.
Human values relegated to the mortuary.
We deserve the world we claim,
On us be shame, shame oh shame.

My English has deteriorated a lot since those times. Sigh.

Something I Really Want For Christmas

A friend of mine was complaining a couple of days back about how she won't be able to celebrate Christmas this year with her family. This was a very big mistake on her part because she chose the wrong person to complain about it to. Don't get me wrong, I can be sympathetic and be a very good listener if I wanted to but WHAT ABOUT ME? I've not even been home for Christmas since 2006. Not to mention I'm stuck in a country where Christmas just goes about like any other day. She got pretty pissed after I told her to 'join the club'. Not my fault. I think. I hope. I don't think so. What was I talking about again?

I can't believe December is here and 2010 is just around the corner. Wow, time does fly. I've already grown accustomed to not being excited about Christmas. Sad, I know. It's like the time a kid finally realizes that Santa is never going to come because he doesn't exist. It's funny that I never believed in Santa? I blame it on my dad for 'not having a chimney'. Truth be told, I stopped looking forward to Christmas a long time ago. Same goes for New Year, Valentines Day and my own birthday.

But if I could ask Santa for something this year, I would ask for a brand new Nikon D300s. Woohoo! With 2 lenses that'll cost a small fortune. I've been really saving a lot ever since coming back to Russia but money seems to hate me because I can never seem to save money for some reason. Sigh. You know that feeling when you really REALLY want something, been reading shit about it online for months, watching reviews, hanging around forums and discussions boards and putting that bloody thing as your wallpaper ( maybe it's just me, I don't know ) only to realize that the only thing standing between the two of you is the price tag and a few measly notes? I was so disappointed when my dad messaged me the 'best' price he could get it for. But hey, life's like that right? It's not the camera but the photographer right? ( this is the part where you nod and agree with me just to make me feel better ).

But I've been a really good boy lately. My friends can vouch for me on this. I read most of the time now both studies and photography. I'm home most of the time - as sober as a judge. So Santa might just decide to pay me a visit on Christmas maybe? I just hope that mofo dresses warm because it's going to be freaking -30 degrees by the time it hits Christmas and we wouldn't want his balls to freeze, would we?

Windows Are Magical

I remember a time when I used to love writing stories. For some I just stopped. This is a story that I posted on my old blog. It's dedicated to a close friend of mine who passed away a couple of years ago because of Cancer. I call it 'The Window'.

This is a story about a friend of a friend of
mine. They were both good friends. The best of friends. They were both born at
the same time, on the same day and in the same place. They even had the same
name. They grew up together and experienced the changes in their life that time
brought with each other by their side. They went to the same school, played the
same sports and even had their first loves at the same time. They were
inseparable and everybody thought that if one should ever leave to meet the Good
Lord earlier, the other would soon follow because of a broken heart.

As they grew up, they had big plans together.
They would go to the same university, study the same course and graduate at the
same time. They would work at the same place or maybe start their own business
together. They even thought about getting married at the same time with each
other. They had a relationship that most brothers would envy and a bond
stronger than the hardest substance on earth. But fate had a different plan for
the both of them as one of them got sick and got home bound. Due to a serious
illness, one of them had to spend the rest of his days stuck in his room and
the only contact that he had with the world outside was through the window he
had in his room.

These 2 friends still kept in touch and the
healthier of the two would visit his friend through that very window to tell
him of the world outside. Oh, how he would look forward to that very hour when
the cheerful face of his friend would appear at the window. In fact, it was the
only thing that kept him going and gave him strength as his illness ate bit by
bit of him every minute of every day.

As time went on, this window became a
significant part of his life. It was through this very window that he watched
his good friend’s life take a 180 degree turn for the worse as his friend too
was diagnosed with the same deadly illness. He watched as his friend was being
crushed with problems from every direction in his life. How much he cried
watching his friend crumble to his knees, breaking down to tears and not being
able to do a single thing to help. How much his heart pained as he watched his
friend’s heart being broken into a millions of pieces by someone whom he
thought loved him as much as he loved her. Still he found himself amazed at how
much his friend could love that person with all the little pieces of his broken
heart. He found himself in tears as he watched his friend turned to alcohol,
drugs and sex for comfort when he couldn’t find it in anywhere else in the world.
Lastly, his own heart broke watching his friend leave behind his God, his
family, his friends and everything that he once held dear to his heart and
watched as his life crumbled along with every last bit of hope that he once
held on to for his dear friend.

This hurt him most because no one else
understood his friend as much as he did. No one ever did and no one ever will.
It’s too late to turn back now, too late for regrets and too late for 2nd
chances. There is no 2nd chance in life. Not even for anyone. He is
now confined to a wheel chair, he has lost half the hair on his head and the
illness has left him in bones. He watches the world go by through the window
everyday with tears filling up his eyes as he remembers his friend. This hurt
him most, more than anyone else in the world because no one else understood his
friend as much as he did. No one ever did and no one ever will because the
window that he looks out from everyday isn’t a window, it’s actually a mirror.

I'm not an Arab. Stop shooting.

It's been awhile since I've posted anything. This is mainly because of the classes that I've had to attend lately. By the time I get back home, my brain won't be functioning normally so I'll be in a zombie-like state most of the time. But it's Saturday today. Yahoo!

I don't understand why people would come to Russia to study. I really don't. But they do keep coming despite vast media coverage of racist attacks in Russia. A couple of weeks ago, I had the pleasure of meeting another idiot like that. A 28 year old dude from Syria by the name of Rami. I was introduced to him by another friend from the Student Council because he had no idea what to do with him.

Now Rami doesn't speak Russian at all and speaks only a bit of English. I find it frustrating trying to communicate with him because I feel like I'm talking to a child with all sorts of hand gestures flying around. People around me on the other hand, find it amusing. I don't blame them because I would be laughing too if I was not on the receiving end.

So as Rami and I try our best to communicate, I picked up a few words in Arabic that might help smoothen the flow. As fate would have it, Rami lives on the same floor as I do. He comes every now and then for help and I seriously don't mind. But there's fine line between being someone of need and being someone who's annoying.

Maybe it's frustrating because we don't communicate that well? Or maybe it's just because he comes at the most inappropriate times. For example, I was having a very late lunch. I was so hungry that I could have eaten a horse and a cow. Well, maybe not a cow but you get the idea. He comes in asking me to translate a few forms, insisting that it'll only take a few minutes. Tired and pissed off, instead of telling him sternly that I have to eat first, I help him out with a smile on my face.

Or maybe it's just because I look like an Arab myself? Because the first time he saw me, he started talking gibberish and only moments later did I realize that it was Arabic ( I'm not ignorant, I was just half awake at that time ). Or maybe he's just trying to recruit me into Al-Qaeda for looking like an Arab? I don't find the image of me with a turban and shouting 'Death to America!' to be appealing. I'm not being racist over here. I get more shit from racism that you can imagine.

So my Arab Brother has yet to do anything that would be the last straw that breaks the camels back. But he did introduce me to a bunch of Iraqis a couple of days back. Gulp. Something tells me I should just forget about French and pick up Arabic instead.

I'm a Catholic. So what?

Don't fuck with me. Okay, maybe that was a bit rude but I think I own the right to say whatever I want when I'm pissed off and that doesn't happen very often. Believe me, even if I do get pissed, I'll usually forget all about it within a few minutes but some people are just gifted in finding the worst in me.

I say this with all due respect to Protestants all over the world but why the hell do you people like to fuck with Catholics? Do you get a kick from it or something? Try Ganja or if you want something a little more hardcore, I'd suggest cocaine or heroin. I don't know about the rest but I seem to be a walking target for you people. Throughout the years, I've had to deal with more shit from you people than anyone else. I don't go around telling people what stupid names you give your churches ( Okay, maybe that was uncalled for. Sue me. ) My modus operandi is that if I don't fuck with you, then you better not fuck with me.

Why am I pissed off? I'll tell you why. I've had a freaking long and tiring day today. I hate Russian bureaucracy. It is merely IMPOSSIBLE to get anything done here. The purpose of a well constructed administration is to maximize efficiency but theirs seem to decrease it. So after a day like this, I was basically looking forward to going home, taking a nice long shower, sitting down and enjoying a cup of coffee while I watch a few episodes of this series that I'm currently hooked on but a certain 'holy man' had other plans for me. It was a freaking long elevator ride from the 1st to the 12th floor.

I wasn't in the mood nor was I interested in the questions that he had for me. I mean, I go to whatever Church I want to. So what if your church is the real deal and mine is a fraud all along? It's my life and I'll be the one dealing with Satan later. Not you. I have no problems with people preaching as long as you don't mock other people's beliefs. Isn't that what you do? No matter what you say, that is what you're doing.

The next time I see that person and he starts his shit again, he won't be as lucky as today. Mark my Words.

Selamat Hari Raya

The title of the post speaks for itself but no harm in saying it again. Selamat Hari Raya to those who celebrate it and to those who don't, I know know what's wrong with you. We're all Malaysians. The more the merrier. No harm in helping make someones day better.

Yesterday night was a really interesting night for me. Nearly everyone was on the phone talking to their families and loved ones. The rest was just helping out with the preparations for today. The atmosphere in the hostel was a totally different one compared to other days when everyone will just in front of their laptops and watch movies. I've got to say that I enjoyed it very much. A bunch of guys came to my room and we watched a Thai horror movie. The thing about Thai horror movies is that they don't make sense most of the time but they never fail to keep you on the edge of your seat. But if they learn to run like the wind every now and then, not to look into places that they're not supposed to and remember that there's always safety in numbers, I think the fatality rate will drop significantly. Dumbasses. I really enjoyed watching that movie. Not just because of the movie but because it's been awhile since my friends and I have done that.

Waking up today, the hostel seemed pretty quiet which was strange because previous Rayas used to cause so much noise pollution that I think even Malaysia was affected. As I sat in front of my laptop, I realized that it could be because most of them were at the embassy already. It was a cold gloomy day but the embassy was radiating so much warmth. It was nice seeing Michelle there and a bunch of people that I've not met in a long time. I really enjoyed catching up with everyone of them. Unfortunately, I can't remember half of the people that walked up to me today. It's not that I'm a snob or anything like that. I'm just very bad with names. I really am. But I do try :-( Anyone got any special remedies for this?

The highlight of the day was the party that we had today in the hostel. The food was good and it's actually nice seeing all of them in one place at the same time. I found myself sitting in a corner while watching everyone joke around and laugh. I got lost in the moment and in my own thoughts. For the slightest of moments, I forgot about all my problems and that I was in Russia. A friend caught me daydreaming and I was pulled into one of their pranks.

I have a fever right now and I doubt that I'll be heading off to the university tomorrow. But I've got to say that I enjoyed Raya this year compared to the previous years for some reason. I just wish I could get the same atmosphere for Christmas :-(

Dumbasses and Politics

Ever notice how in a group of friends, there'll always be one guy who is very 'versed' in politics? He will have read every right wing and left wing newspaper and will always have an opinion on whatever is it that's going on right now all over the world. Let it be the rise of oil prices, who got demoted or who got promoted and even on same sex marriages sometimes. Gosh, I love it when people concern themselves with things that are NEVER going to effect their lives.

I usually tolerate these kinds of people because from what I see, people like these usually have a few reasons on why they go into politics in the first place. No. 1 - they see the mistakes and wrongs of the current situation and feel that they can do better. No. 2 - they THINK they sound cool when they talk about politics and my favorite No. 3 - they just have too much free time :-P Reason 2 and 3 are why I never bothered about politics. Although I do keep up with current events and stuff, I never liked it. In fact, I think that politics is just one dumbass losing the election and another dumbass coming to power. Either way, we're screwed. I may be wrong here but hey, that's just what I think.

Now, I have this friend. An old friend actually. We were in high school together. We lived on the same floor in our hostel but we never really spoke much. He was a weird little fuck. He keeps to himself all the time and never really mingles around. That doesn't mean we alienated him. No. In fact, I remember telling him on quite a few occasions to come to my room because we had extra food but he never showed up. We don't even know where the hell is he from but we kinda have an idea due to the West Malaysian accent that he has. Bear in mind, I never hated him and even when I was back home, I tried contacting him a few times because I heard he was in KK.

This motherfucker has turned from a quiet little fuck into a hardcore Malay supremacist. But hey, whatever makes u happy right? He'll post all sorts of shit on Facebook which amuses me sometimes because I don't think that Facebook is the place to start a propaganda or something. It's like going to a kindergarden and preaching about how they should all start hating each other and when they're all old enough, they are obligated to kill each other. LOL. I never really paid much attention to him until one day, he said something about an Indian was trying to diss Tun Mahathir or something. I just casually commented something but I was in a rush so I forgot to put an 'LOL'. That very same day after I came back from class, a full blown 'debate' was already on its way on his profile.

I never bothered to reply because I just wanted to stay out of it but I've got to say that some of the things he said were actually very racist. In fact, I feel that he should get his ass thrown into ISA for the things that he said. I was never a big fan of racism. In fact, I think it's stupid. But then again, everyone of us has a tiny bit of racism in all of us whether we'd like to admit it or not. I admit that I may be racist sometimes but I keep it under wraps and it's not up to the point where I'll go out and lynch someones ass. Look at it this way, I am of Indian heritage. I grew up in a Chinese neighbourhood and went to a Malay school. My best friend is a Punjabi/Chinese and most of my friends are Malays. But I never noticed this until that dumbass pointed it out.

We, East Malaysians are proud of the fact that we live in multi-cultural communities and we were never bothered by ethnicity. Of course there are a few bad apples that I'd like to bitch slap but overall, there's nothing wrong.

What happened to that dumb fuck? Well, after this Chinese guy who was my senior back in school screwed his ass ( not literally and no homo ), that guy just shut his mouth and turned his attention on the Malaysian new F1 Team. Serves you right, asshole.

Happy Birthday, Pap

I know it's my dads birthday today ( don't worry, Sarah. This I WON'T forget ). To be honest, I don't really know how old you are exactly today but sincerely, I wish I was there to celebrate it with you. I can't remember the last time I was there to be with you on your birthday because as long as I can remember, I've always been away from home. I was either away in MRSM, in KL doing my foundation and here in God's hell on Earth. I'd give anything to be with you today but I guess it'll be awhile before I'll get to wish you in person on your birthday.

There are a lot of things I wish I had the courage to tell you in your face. I know we never got along on a lot of things especially when it comes to religion and politics. But you've been the biggest influence in my life. I used to hate going for all those courses that you used to send me on during the school holidays because they usually contribute to unnecessary brain usage during holidays but I still went because I didn't want to disappoint you. I especially remember the typing course that you sent me for 2 months when I was in primary 6. The ENTIRE class was filled with young girls who just graduated from school and wanted to become secretaries while putting out for something better. What the hell was a primary 6 boy doing there? Only recently did I realize the importance of all those classes and courses that I went for and you'd be happy to know, that nothing that I've learnt was left unused. In fact, they've just helped me more along the way.

I realize that I was never the model son that you wanted me to be. I've always considered myself to be the black sheep of the family for obvious reasons and will always do. All I've ever wanted was for you to be proud of me. I've seen the glitter in your eyes when you speak of ex-students who are doing very well right now and the biggest reason why I took this scholarship in the first place despite knowing that I'm going to hate being here was so that you'd have the same glitter in your eyes when you spoke of me. I'm so sorry for everything. :-(

I admire you for all the things that you've got through but I just wish that you'd let go of the past and pay more attention to the present. You've got 3 head-breaking grandsons/monsters and another one on the way. I hope it's a girl to balance the equation because I dont think I can stand the idea of 4 kids running around the house causing havoc. A loving wife who will not leave your side no matter what ( although she can be a headache at times ) and 4 children who think the world of you.

I've always kept you in my prayers, Pap. There's a lot more I wish I could say to you and I think I shall leave it out of blogspot to avoid unwanted embarassment :-P So, yeah. Happy birthday again, Pap. I love you. By the way, that conference call thingy that akka planned was AWESOME. I'm glad we could all sing you 'happy birthday' even though it was over the phone.

Get Me Out Of Here

I hate this place. I really do. I refer to this place as 'God's hell on Earth'. That should more or less give you and idea on how much I hate this place. Although 'hate' is quite an understatement. Sometimes I wish that a nuclear war would just break out and all of us would have to be shipped back home immediately. I know that hell has a higher chance of freezing over before that happens though. Damn it.

I keep thinking to myself 'WHY THE HELL DID I COME HERE?' and is usually immediately reminded of a younger and more naive version of me whose only dream was to go overseas to pursue his studies. But fate would have it that I would get my ass thrown to this place. If I could go back a couple of years earlier, I would kick 38 different kinds of shit out of my younger self to have made him stay put in dearest KK.

Ask anyone studying here and you'll not hear even a single person singing praises about this place. If they do, it's usually one of the 2 scenarios. 1 - they're bigtime alcoholics who can drink like there's no tomorrow and 2 - they're just NUTS. I can't imagine how is it that I used to enjoy being here. Like I said, I was young and naive. I was a dumbass. There, I said it. It takes balls to degrade yourself like that but yeah, I did it.

Why am I still here? Well, I'm under scholarship and I can't afford to pay back whatever sum of money I may owe MARA. But even if I, by some miracle or by the Grace of God manage to obtain that amount of money, it's always the thought of disappointing my father that will kill me slowy. I just wish that he would understand but I doubt that he will anytime soon. It's not easy studying in these conditions. His reasoning is that 'if others can do it, why can't you?'. Well, maybe I'm not as strong as you think I am. Imagine waking up everyday looking forward to sunset so that you get the day over with as soon as possible. Prison isn't as bad as this. Oh wait. Maybe it is. At least we don't get our asses raped over here. But we do get racist attacks from Neo-Nazi Groups. It's kinda stupid if you think about it. They lost half of their male population to Nazi Germany during World War 2 and they have Neo-Nazi Groups here now? Do these people even have brains?

Oh, by the way, on a lighter note. A friend of mine mentioned to me a couple of days back that a friend of hers is coming here to do medicine ( if you're reading this and most probably you will, I apologize in advance and instead of getting pissed at me for this, bear in mind that I did my best to hold on to any sarcastic and rude remarks that I would have normally given under normal circumstances ). The standard response to a statement like this would usually be 'Why here? Couldn't he have gone somewhere else?'. The best part is, that dude turned down other offers because he wanted 'adventure'. For those of you who know me quite well, you can probably imagine how my facial expression and body gestures would be like after hearing that. For those who don't, please get to know me better ;-) Anyways, back to our Christopher Columbus, all I can say is, he's going to get one hell of an adventure here. Cheers to him and his future endeavours. Lol.

So, yeah. Please pray that I won't decide to jump out of the window ( I live on the 12th floor so that's gonna leave more than just cuts and bruises ). This is by far the biggest obstacle that I've had yet to overcome. Sigh.

Why not?

This is probably my 3rd attempt at starting a blog. Over the years, I've had a lot of people who have walked up to me and suggested that I start a blog but I would just smile, nod and give the impression that I was taking them seriously when I'll just walk away later and forget about the entire thing. ( if you read this and recall a smirk on my face when you were talking to me about something serious and getting no feedback whatsoever from me later on, I'm truly sorry. )

Why did my previous 2 attempts fail?

Hmm. Well, my 1st attempt was basically this Friendster blog that everyone had back in the day when Friendster was the 'in' thing. Now everyone seems to have moved to Facebook leaving Friendster just a distant memory filled with viruses and spams. You have no idea how hard I laughed when I received a 'message' on Friendster from this really buff dude that I know sending me links to 'his nude pictures'. Both an amusing and scary thought at the same time. I haven't logged into Friendster in AGES and I'm not sure if my account is still active although I do receive emails from Friendster every now and then. My 2nd blog was basically a one week thing where I attempted to keep myself busy to distract my mind from this hell I'm currently in. As you can see, that went well.

So, why this 3rd attempt?

Well, some people say the 3rd time is always the charm. I say, those people can go eat a.. Nevermind. Well, I have a lot of crap and nonsense in my head that I feel is worth sharing. Sometimes. I just hope I don't offend anyone or get a court case along the way. But most of all, this was my younger sisters doing. She's an awesome writer. In fact, she writes better than me. Period. This is more or less a way to keep in touch with her and so that she'll know what's going on in my life right now. If you're reading this, I love you, Sarah. :-)

So, yeah. I just spent bloody 3 hours on trying to figure out how to upload themes and shit into blogger. I'm pretty proud of myself but considering on how fast other people are doing it, I feel like such a dumbass. I felt like a grandpa in a nursing home somewhere trying to figure out how to get the coffee maker to work or something. So yeah, cheers to me and the overpriced aerospace engineering degree that I'll be getting in 2 more years. You better hope that I won't be designing Malaysia's next satellite or the plane that you're going to board. Hehe.

May I keep this blog going for as long as I can. Amen.