Last night was very dramatic for me as I probed very deeply into a question that every human being asks themselves at a certain point in their lives. What am I doing here? What is my life's calling? My answer to those questions are, I still have no freaking clue! But I know what it isn't and that is NOT along the lines of being a doctor.
Now I have this friend who is quite known for having 'anger management issues'. Most people can't bear with him but I tolerate him because I feel that his heart is in the right place. So I was asleep and my roommate woke me up all of a sudden saying that this guy was looking for me and I could hear his voice outside shouting 'Den, Den, my hand got cut off'. Now, he's also known to be quite the prankster and I thought he was just pulling my leg because we just watched a zombie movie so I thought he was just trying to be funny.
My eyes were as round as plates the minute I got out into the corridor because there was blood everywhere. It was as if little bloody leprechauns were dancing all over the corridor floor and his hand was literally dangling off his wrist. He wanted to open his room door and I couldn't figure it out, so I had to hold his hand to keep it from toppling over for a few minutes and I could actually feel his bones. Not forgetting that I was getting drenched in his blood as well. I always thought of myself as someone who is able to handle blood but boy, was I wrong. I felt as if I was going to faint before my friend.
After a few cigarettes, I got my brain working again and got things together. The ambulance came and took him away immediately. I was left standing in the cold, drenched in blood as I walk back the blood filled corridor. I was so disturbed that I only fell asleep around 6 in the morning. I have no idea what the fuck happened to him and the only thing he tells us is that he slipped.
We came up with all sorts of theories and one of them was attempted suicide because that was what the guard suggested. I guess we'll just have to wait till he comes home first.
So, yeah. I remember a time once when I wanted to become a doctor because I wanted to make a change in the world and I wanted to help people. Once I got into form 4 and started learning biology, I realized that I'd be saving MORE lives by NOT becoming a doctor because I won't be killing people with my 'license to kill'. Talk about a bullet dodged for mankind.